The Wrong Way To Make A Sales Presentation (Wheeler enters the store of Abernathe Schmaltz, who is busy dusting off the shelves.) WHEELER: “Is Abernathe Schmaltz in? I take it you’re the grocery boy here.” SCHMALTZ: “I’ll have you understand I’m Abernathe Schmaltz.” WHEELER: “Well, howya fixed for butter and eggs in this store?” SCHMALTZ: “Fine – wanna buy some?” WHEELER: “Oh, you got me wrong, brother – I’m a butter -and-egg salesman. I’ve been sen t down here to interest you in Bickley butter and eggs.” SCHMALTZ: “Well, go on and interest me!” WHEELER: “First, I want to tell you about the background of A. F. Bickley & Sons. We’ve been in business since 1870, and ---- “ SCHMALTZ: “Well, I take butter and eggs from a farmer. Are your butter and eggs any better?” WHEELER: “They sure are, but let me tell you about the personnel of our organ - I- zation. Take our boss, for example. He’s a great old duffer. Likes to fish down in Chesapeake Bay. Why you should see the fish he caught last week when he --- “ SCHMALTZ: “I like fishing too, but tell me: Are your butter and eggs better than the ones I get from the farmer?” WHEELER: “Sure they are, but let me tell you about our sales manager. He’s the fel low, you know, who sent me down here to sell you. He’s one of those theorists. Gets a lot of wild ideas, and us fellows out on the firing line have gotta be guinea pigs for him. Now if I was sales manager ---- “ SCHMALTZ: “But are your butter and eggs better than the farmer’s?” WHEELER (Takes piece of candy out of box.): “Sure they’re better, but --- “ SCHMALTZ: “Say, don’t eat that piece of candy – that’s MY PROFITS!” WHEELER: “Sorry – but now look- it here, Schmaltz, we’re wasting a lot of time. I want to do you one favor.” SCHMALTZ: (angry.) “Oh, you want to do me a favor, heh?”
P. 115
Powered by FlippingBook